Mar02

Why no animals are being used to predict the outcome of worldcup matches

by wasim on March 2nd, 2011 at 8:05 am
Posted In: Cricket, Cricket Pakistan

It is a proven fact that animals have better sports predictive abilities than humans, Maggie the monkey, Paul the Octopus (R.I.P) and the unnamed Orangutan (which predicted Green Bay Packers as the 2011 Super Bowl winners) are a few examples. I am sure Cricket broadcasters must have known this fact all along but still decided to rely on inferior human skills, no surprise there, if the all mighty BCCI can resist the deployment of hot spot and Sniko then it is foolish to expect that they would support the superior predictive skills of animals. Are they just averse to technology in general or is there a more sinister motive behind it?

Well you guessed it right, it’s the later. Have you ever thought why cricket experts from all continents unanimously declared India as the most favorite team to lift the world cup despite its feeble bowling lineup? Well if you are thinking that they made this outlandish prediction based on India’s recent W/L ratio then think again there is more to it than what meets the eye.

Animals don’t have any greed they can’t be tempted with or bought over by lucrative broadcasting or IPL contracts, they don’t get confused because of their personal biases they just give clear signals without any confusion and don’t attach any if’s and buts’ with their prediction because they don’t fear any embarrassment, these are all human weaknesses.

Wasim Akram was the first expert who predicted that India will lift the 2011 Cricket world cup, in order to ensure that nobody beats him in making that prediction first, he started predicting three months before the world cup and now he leaves no stone unturned in reminding us that the honor of making that prediction first belonged to him the rest of the world just copied his views. But Akram knowing that he still holds a Pakistani passport also declared Pakistan as a favorite; would you expect this kind of hypocrisy from Paul the Octopus? I guess not. Humans are shameless.

Then there are experts who have picked 4-5 teams as favorites hoping that anyone of them would finally win and they won’t have to face any public embarrassment at the time of the final result.  Imagine, can we expect such quackery from Paul the Octopus?

The funniest predictions come from the great Imran Khan, he also declared India as the clear favorite, he has a habit of changing his prediction after every match, his predictions are always based on if’s and buts’ i.e.  “jay Sheeda chal gaya” ( if XYZ player peaked at the right time then…..) Sheeda in case of Pakistan is Shahid Afridi, in India’s case it is Sehwag and I am not sure who his Sheeda is in the English and the South African team, because both teams have several Sheedays who can win the world cup for their team.

 Paul would have never created such confusion by going back and forth and confusing the public with if’s and buts’.

Finally there are some Australian experts who usually are cocky and arrogant in making their predictions, they would make the prediction and then blab nonstop throughout the tournament in the commentary box in support of their team to an extent that all the other teams automatically start suffering from a major inferiority complex and later on would inevitably lose. This is the only reason their predictions are usually correct, look at Shane Warne, he is the only human oracle who can come close to Paul the Octopus, and in fact I don’t think that Paul ever predicted a tied game in that respect Warne is a little better.

The human race through Australians could have competed with animals but once again the damned IPL contracts came in the way and forced a few Aussies to declare India as the front runner to lift the cup. And a few of them after failing to control their racist emotions declared, Australia, England and South Africa as the front runners and this is how humanity’s last hope of competing with animals in predicting sports fell apart.